London Is Not England

London Is Not England

Avi: 86 carats

Rosebud: Where?

Avi: London

Rosebud: London?

Avi: London

Avi’s colleague: London?

Avi: Yes, London. You know: fish, chips, cup of tea, bad food, worse weather, Mary fucking Poppins .......... LONDON !!!!

(From the film Snatch)

An accurate description of London; Capital Of The Empire. And here I stress, Capital Of The Empire. A melting pot of diverse culture having more colours than my water colour palette can offer. Any person travelling to London to experience the English way of life is a fool conceived by a minging idiot. The best bit is when this fool goes home bragging to their mates:

Fool: I just got back from England. Love it there. Love the people, love the food and its weather.

Fool’s mate: OOOOOoooooouuuuuuuuuu. Sweet. So where about were you in England?

Fool: LONDON

Fool’s mate: And?

Fool: London. You know: fish, chips, cup of tea, fantastic food: I had pizza at Leicester Square, XL Bacon at Oxford Street, doner kebab at Covent Garden, jumbo hotdogs & roasted almonds at some park, Mousaka at Camden Town; good weather but I couldn’t tell since the sky was grey all the time, Mary fucking Poppins .......... LONDON !!!!

Fool's mate: And those are food of the English people?
Fool: EEehhh..... I guess. I ate it in England.
Fool’s mate: No theatre play?
Fool: London is no Hollywood. Right? 

Fool’s mate: @_@